Monthly Archives: December 2010

I Love Bunnies!

I know I’m not in China and I am clearly not Chinese.  But I do work with a lovely woman who is Chinese.  Yesterday we were talking about the Chinese New Year (February 3rd) and I asked her what year was coming up in the Chinese Zodiac.  The Year of the Rabbit.  Hmmm.  I immediately googled the calendar to see what year I was born in.  RABBIT!!!  That’s right!!  It’s MY year!!!  Nothing can go wrong this year right??  Right??? 

I’m not going to sit here and make up some grand wish list of great things to happen, but, I am going to ask/hope for one thing.  I just don’t want anyone I love to die in “my” year.  That’s it.  That’s not too much right? 

Ok, maybe I’ll secretly wish for other things too….

I love you.

Happy New Year everyone!!!



Sugar Free – Explained

I’m not diabetic.  I do not have a sugar allergy or intollerance.  I do not have even the slightest aversion to sucrose.  In fact, I love sugar.  Sugar Free is just a nickname Bruce gave me when we first met.  Even I can’t recall exactly why he chose those words.  I think it must have had something to do with my (cough cough) colorful vocabulary.  Basically meaning that there was nothing sugary about me.  Yeah, I’m a gem.  Anyway, it stuck.  He still calls me that to this day….

Me:  “I love you baby”

Bruce:  “I love you too.”

Me:  “How come?”

Bruce:  “Because you’re my Sugar Free baby.”

Me:  **smile**

Bruce:  “And because you don’t smell horrible.”

Me:  **sigh**


What Day Is It?

I know most people do random thoughts stuff on Tuesdays, but I’m doing it today.  I’m a rebel like that.

Have you ever gone to the store and at the last minute decide on some sort of impulse purchase?  Then, by the time you get home you’ve forgotten about it?  Then, after some time goes by, hours usually, but sometimes even a whole day, you find it in your bag and you’re all surprised?  I did that today.  What the hell is that all about?  I mean, really.  If the item was so damn important that I strayed from my carefully planned list, how is it that it became so unimportant as soon as it was out of my sight.  Anyway, it still has a happy ending because it’s like a fun little surprise when you discover it.  I love surprises.

My pets are assholes sometimes.  Murphy woke me up at 1:30 in the morning the night before last because apparently he had to poop.  Really, asshole?  It’s the middle of the goddamn night.  So after I let him out and waited…and waited….and waited, I let him back in and climbed back into bed.  But I couldn’t fall back asleep.  Instead of tossing and turning and irritating the shit out of the Hubs, I grabbed my Kindle and went out to the couch to read.  Well, now the cats see that I’m awake and they are nocturnal by nature anyway, so they think it’s playtime.  Now I’m laying there trying to relax so maybe I can drift back to sleep but nooo, I’m listening to the goddamn Kitty 500 and Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Kitties.  Awesome.  Meanwhile, Murphy, the one who was responsible for waking me up in the first place, is snoozing away in the corner on his memory foam bed. It was 3:30 in the morning before all this nonsense ended and I fell asleep.  6am came very early yesterday.  Assholes.

I’m thinking of trying to quit smoking again.  I said thinking about it.  I don’t really want to.  I love smoking.  But the price of ciggys in Washington state is fucking ridiculous.  The Hubs smokes as well, so I’m thinking he would have to quit too for this to be a success.  Think of how much extra money we would have each month to go towards a new boat!  We’ll see how this one goes…..

As a kind of Christmas gift, I got a chef’s coat with my name and the title of Executive Chef embroidered on it.  I love to cook, but all I really want to do is put it on and take a photo of me heating up some Spaghettio’s or ordering a pizza .

Half day at work tomorrow then a 4 1/2 day weekend again!!  Yay!!!

Thinkin’ about actually staying up ’till midnight this New Year’s to watch the fireworks that they shoot off the Space Needle.  My supervisor from work (like I have a supervisor somewhere other than work?) lives right by the SN so she said we could come over.  We’ll see how this one goes as well….

Ok!  I guess that’s all I’ve got for now.


Plants Are Funny (not funny ha ha)

When the Hubs and I left Colorado for Seattle, I rescued as many plants from Bob’s house as I could fit in our rented U-Haul.  Not just because I like plants, but, because that ass-hat bitch that he was married to said to me, with a dismissive wave of her chubby little hand, “Take them.  I sure don’t want the fucking things.  They’ll just die here.”  Oh!  Thanks for the sensitivity regarding death in this house.  Inconsiderate *&%$#.

It makes me happy to have them, because they were his; and they are alive.  But, they also make me a little sad when I’m in my reflective, “I can’t believe he’s gone”, kind of mood.  I mean, I take such care to make sure they have water and light (the light part is tough in the Pacific NW this time of year) because they were his, and because I don’t know if I could take it if they died too.  But, if I’m going to be perfectly honest here, sometimes the fact that they are alive and not him makes me feel….ummm……I don’t even know how to articulate it.  Funny plants.  You confuse me.

Yeah Yeah…..

I’m told that today is Christmas.  So, to the 2.5 people that read this blog,  Merry Christmas!  Though most people gather with huge groups of their family and friends to open presents, cook elaborate meals and do other festive shit, it’s just another day to me and the Hubs.  We don’t have children, so it’s just not that big of a deal to us.  Ok, the fact that it is a paid day off of work is kind of a big deal.  What are we up to today?  Watching motocross and Star Wars and being pretty much some lazy ass bums.  I might get crazy and cook a Cardboardio (Totino Party Pizza) later, but we’ll see.  Anyhoo……

Shitter’s full!!!


My Hermit Father

It’s the holiday season.  Even though the hubs and I don’t really get into the festive shit this time of year (no tree or blinking lights will be found at our house) it does get me thinking about my family.   And today, it’s overwhelmingly,  my dad.  When my dad retired a few years ago, he decided he wanted to go live in the deserts of New Mexico/Arizona and shoot rattlesnakes and drink beer.  Whatev.  To each their own, right? 

This is an email (slightly edited in the interest of protecting certain details) I sent out after our trip to hunt him down visit him, to those that care about him and wondered what the fuck he was up to. 


The Irish do not grow ’em tall

So, we have returned from our trip to find my long lost wayward father.  It was an interesting trip, but enjoyable.  We flew to Page on Thursday, stayed the night at the Wahweap Lodge and headed out in our trusty rented Hyundai Friday.  We stayed the night in Flagstaff at the Monte Vista Hotel.  It’s said to be haunted so we were hoping to see an apparition, but no such luck.  We did however stay in the Michael Stipe Suite and I could swear I heard some shitty R.E.M. songs from days past.  But, maybe it was just me. 

Saturday morning we were off to Rodeo!  We decided to take a more scenic route than the interstate.  We went down through Winslow, Snowflake and Sho Low.  It was quite beautiful.  We got a call from daddy at about 3:00pm, we were about 30 miles away.  We pulled up to the Rodeo cafe where he instructed us to meet him and about a minute later this tiny woodsman/mountain man looking person pulled up in a mini van waving his arms at us.  It was my dad!  It was so good to see him finally!  He took us down the road across the border into Arizona and out to his land/”house”.  Patch, the hound dog, was there to greet us along with Art’s 3 dogs.  Art is daddy’s friend whom he is now sharing his property with.  He is about the same age as dad, is from the east coast (Boston I believe) he is Irish Catholic, he also served in the military during Viet Nam and he is also left handed like dad.  They could have been separated at birth.  It’s good that he has a buddy close by. 

We chatted and took in the glorious wonder that is my father’s home.  He was kind enough to point out, “One day Heather,  this will all be yours!”  Lucky me.. 

We headed back into Rodeo to hit the wee market before it closed.  We bought some hot dogs and such and headed to our rented cottage for the night.  It was a nice place run by a nice woman named Dianne.  It has a laundry facility as well and apparently this is where dad comes to do his washing. 

The next morning we headed out to have coffee with the boys.  This is how the morning ritual at mile marker 318.3 Hwy 50 goes:  Dad wakes up to check the angle of the sun.  Nope, not peeking over the mountains yet, back to sleep.  When he hears the generator start “next door”, he knows Art is up and making coffee.  When the sun makes its appearance, dad gets up and grabs his lighter fluid to get the fire pit roaring.  By this time, Art has coffee but he is just about too frozen to walk over to the fire.  There they sit, drinking their coffee and throwing bits of kindling on the fire until the sun is up far enough to keep them warm.  At this point, Bruce and I have shown up and Art gladly puts on more coffee for us.  All I can say about that brew is this; if one was not accustomed to drinking coffee, this particular coffee could put someone in an early grave.  It had such strength that no amount of spearmint infused gum could destroy it’s power.  We “enjoyed” the taste of that coffee for hours after we had finished it. Mmmmm.  After coffee time, Art heads off to feed his horse. 

Bruce and I decided to go sight seeing down to Tombstone.  Daddy declined our invitation, but informed us that we could get cigarettes just across the Mexican border for $12 per carton.  Now, I love a good deal on some cigarettes, but I’m not going into Mexico to get them.  I watch the news…..I know what’s going on down there!  Anyway, Tombstone was cool, but Bisbee was really cool.  I could have stayed longer poking around in all the shops, but we thought we’d get back to spend some more time with daddy. 

It seems that he was indeed quite ill for a while, more so than anyone was aware of.  Back in September he began having stomach problems which became bad enough that he was flown by helicopter to Tucson for emergency surgery.  He was hospitalized for 2 weeks that time.  He returned some time later and was there for another 2 weeks.  He was cut open from sternum to stomach and across.  I still can’t believe he never called anyone to come help him.  He is now on a special diet and says he will never be the same again.  The new JPC eats yogurt every morning and hasn’t had a beer in months.

All in all, he seems pretty content.  From what we discovered, his daily chores consist of making coffee and gathering wood for the fire.  There is a book wagon that comes once a month and daddy and Art each check out 10 books to keep them occupied.  He often wakes up in the middle of the night unable to sleep, so he likes to read.  Art has a telephone, so I feel better knowing that.  They are also on the list to have electricity put in soon.  They have been stock piling lumber to build a cabin in the near(?) future.  I guess they need some permits or soils samples or some shit before they can do much.  Any way, it was really good to see him and I feel much better having met a few of the locals and seeing who and what he has around him.  I miss having my father close by and I guess there is no changing that.  He is and always has been one to do what he wants to do, but at least I know he’s happy, and that makes me happy.

Cheers, Slainte & Merry Christmas


I promised to tell you what was in my Christmas package from last night.  Since I have more than 5 seconds tonight, I shall oblige.

KINDLE!!! – Yay to the yay-ah!!  I love to read so this is awesome for me.  The downside:  I love to do my reading on my bus commute to and from work.  After the recent news story, which I linked in a previous post (sorry….not gonna link it again) about a pregnant chick getting a beat down for her iPod, I don’t think I want to take it on public transit with me.  Boo.  Whatev’s.  I’ll manage.  I did take it for a test run in bed last night  (that could SO be taken out of context) and found that it’s going to take some getting used to how to hold it (again…..dirty mind taking over) so that I don’t keep pushing the buttons that turn the page.  I’m too giggly to continue with this……  heehee.

LEFT FOR DEAD 1 & 2 – (for Bruce’s XBOX) I am not coordinated enough to play such games, (there are like 16 buttons on an XBOX controller…..I have 10 fingers. ‘Nuff said) but I do loves me some zombies.  So, this gift, intended for my hubs, is a gift for me too.  Even though I can’t participate in the controller part of it, I love watching other people play.  Let’s face it, with the graphics these days, it’s like watching a movie where it is absolutely acceptable, and encouraged, for me to yell “Get out of the way bitch!  Ahhhhh!!  They’re coming for you!!  Get a pipe bomb!!”  Yay for zombies!

SNUGGIE – I have made so much fun of these damn things that I am embarrassed to say that I really kinda like it.

I also got a bunch of my Nana’s vintage costume jewelery, little purses, etc.  That stuff might just be my favorite part of it all.  Because it’s kinda priceless.  Love ya, Nan.

Thanks to my mom for sending this stuff to us.  You rock.

Merry Christmas!  Oh!  And Happy Solstice!